Gaslighting is a really popular topic on social media these days. It’s also possible that it is no longer possible, and I am just so not with it that I am a year behind.

Anyways, it’s still a cool topic and it’s worth writing a little primer about it

Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation in which a person or group makes someone question their own sanity, memory, or perception of events. The goal of gaslighting is to gain and maintain power and control over the victim. Gaslighting can happen in personal relationships, in the workplace, or even in politics and society. It is considered as a form of emotional abuse and can have severe mental health consequences.

From a neuroscience perspective, gaslighting can be seen as a form of trauma. When someone’s reality is constantly questioned or distorted, it can cause confusion and uncertainty in the brain. It can also lead to changes in the brain’s structure and function, particularly in the hippocampus, which is responsible for forming and storing memories. Research has shown that individuals who have experienced trauma, such as gaslighting, have a smaller hippocampus and a weaker ability to form and recall memories. This can make it difficult for the victim of gaslighting to trust their own memories and perceptions of reality.

From a social psychology perspective, gaslighting is a form of power and control. The gaslighter uses their position of power to manipulate and exploit the victim. Research has shown that individuals in positions of power are more likely to engage in gaslighting behavior. This can be seen in the workplace, where a boss may manipulate an employee to make them doubt their own abilities or in a personal relationship, where a partner may manipulate their partner to make them doubt their own sanity.

From a psychoanalytic perspective, gaslighting can be seen as a form of defense mechanism. The gaslighter may use gaslighting as a way to avoid taking responsibility for their actions or to avoid facing uncomfortable truths. They may also use gaslighting as a way to project their own feelings of insecurity or inadequacy onto the victim.

From an interpersonal neurobiology perspective, gaslighting can be seen as a form of emotional dysregulation. Emotional dysregulation occurs when an individual is unable to control their emotions, which can lead to harmful behavior towards others. When an individual gaslights another person, they are disregarding the other person’s emotional experience and well-being, and instead focusing on their own need for control and power. This can have negative effects on the relationship and the well-being of both parties.

Gaslighting is a popular concept because it is a subtle and insidious form of manipulation that can be hard to detect. It can happen in any type of relationship and can have severe mental health consequences. It’s important to be aware of the signs of gaslighting and to know how to protect yourself if you suspect that you or someone you know is being gaslighted. It’s also important to seek professional help if you suspect that you are being gaslighted. Therapy can help individuals to regain a sense of trust in their own perceptions and memories and to regain a sense of control in their relationships and in their lives.

The trap here is to NOT spend your Psychotherapy sessions trying to diagnose THEM and figure out their psychopathology. Your therapist doesn’t know them, and your psychotherapy is not where we share our opinions, you have enough opinions about your ex from your friends. That’s not what we’re there for. Seriously, don’t fall into this trap, it will not lead you anywhere good and your therapist will definitely try to keep you away from this tangent. Think of it as trying to look for new interpretations of a data set that isn’t changing. There’s merit at first, but at some point, it becomes trying to get blood from a stone; it’s not happening and you need to stop.

Some people may be more susceptible to gaslighting because of certain factors such as:

• Low self-esteem: Individuals with low self-esteem may be more likely to doubt themselves and to accept the gaslighter’s distorted version of reality.

• Trauma history: Individuals who have experienced previous traumatic events may be more vulnerable to gaslighting due to their heightened sensitivity to emotional manipulation.

• Social isolation: Individuals who are socially isolated may be more susceptible to gaslighting as they may have fewer people to support them and to provide an alternative perspective.

• Dependence on the gaslighter: Individuals who depend on the gaslighter for emotional, financial, or practical support may be more likely to accept the gaslighter’s distorted version of reality.

• Lack of assertiveness: People who lack assertiveness skills may have difficulty standing up for themselves and may be more likely to accept the gaslighter’s manipulation.

• Difficulty in identifying emotional manipulation: Some people might not be aware of how to identify emotional manipulation and may not be able to recognize when they are being gaslighted.

It’s important to note that anyone can be a target of gaslighting, regardless of their personality or background. However, people with certain characteristics may be more vulnerable to this type of manipulation. It’s important to be aware of the signs of gaslighting and to know how to protect yourself if you suspect that you or someone you know is being gaslighted.

In conclusion, gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation that can have severe mental health consequences. It can happen in any type of relationship and can be subtle and hard to detect. From a neuroscience perspective, gaslighting can be seen as a form of trauma that can lead to changes in the brain’s structure and function. From a social psychology perspective, gaslighting is a form of power and control. From a psychoanalytic perspective, gaslighting can be seen as a form of defense mechanism and from an interpersonal neurobiology perspective, gaslighting can be seen as a form of emotional dysregulation. It is important to be aware of the signs of gaslighting and to know how to protect yourself if you suspect that you or someone you know is being gaslighted.